Hot and Bothered
I haven't gone to Fujitsu this morning, something happened yesterday which has left me with mixed feelings about myself and those around me.
After yesterdays class I agreed to go for lunch with my instructor Mr.Hong, it was a big deal for him as it was our first lunch date together so he decided we should go to a place in the country, about 15 minutes out of town.
On the way we passed the DongJuPock hot spring and Mr.Hong suggested we go in for a while and soak away the tensions of Fujitsu.
The lonely planet says "....there are many hotsprings throughout korea...nudity is optional."
Ive been considering visiting the hotspring for awhile, but that last sentence in the guide book has always held me back "...nudity is optional" I certainly didnt want to be nude with Mr.Hong and it was the last thing on my mind when we headed out countryside, so I told him that I felt a cold coming on and perhaps a hotspring wan't the best idea.
"Oh Siemon you be ok, drink 'dis" he said, handing me a disgusting deer antler (and god knows what else) energy tonic as we pulled into the driveway.
"Listen Mr.Hong I'm really hungry perhaps we should just..." I couldnt finish the sentence as Mr.Hong put his hand in front of my face laughed and said, " is ok, me pay, no dutcheepay, take ticket"
so now it was too late and I resigned myself to the visit, It couldn't be too bad right? nudity after all is only 'optional'
Now its not that I have a problem with nudity, or being nude, its just I have a unique body shape (in this country anyway) and a tendency to turn pink at a sudden change of temperature.
I dont have any problems downstairs, my winkle is no smaller than anyone elses but my ex-girlfriend once told me that it appears smaller than other peoples because of my thigh and buttock shape, and this is not a problem.
So we went inside and were given locker keys. Instantly my fear was recognised,
NO bathing suits!!!!!
I stood there for awhile feeling nauseous and I realised I was crying, goddamnit! not now!
Mr.Hong was undressed in a flash and I was surprised that although a bald man he was covered in the most impressive body hair, and like most Koreans, was hung like a horse
I got myself together and slowly undressed, Mr.Hong was keen to get into it so he said he would shower and meet me in the sauna.
Once I'd taken off my clothes I felt a little better about the experience, we're all men, and I was sure noone was going to stare at me for being a little different.
I grabbed a little 'teatowel' which didnt quite go full circle around me and walked to the main room, there were probably about 20 men in their, most of whom lloked like they were an army group, and when I walked in, silence fell over the room. i decided to make a beeline straight for the sauna which was in the back corner, but that became difficult as my glasses quickly fogged up in the humid environment.
Eventually I found my way, said hi to Mr.Hong, and took a seat back corner of the room.
After a minute or two Mr.Hong announced he was going to the toilet. Soon after he left the heat really started to get to me and i could feel myself 'pinking up', SOMEONE just HAD to say something, "excusee meee mool de ruel ga yo?"
although im still learning korean i knew what he was saying wasnt nice, and it was enough for me, I stood up threw my towel on the floor and said "Excusee meee you all think youre pretty cool dont you picking on somebody different!" with that I stormed out and made straight for the dressing room, i couldnt get changed fast enough. Mr.Hong was surprised to see me as he came from the toilets "Siemon, ok? why? sick?..." thats when I put MY hand in front of HIS face and said, "I didnt sign up for this mate! and i'm leaving!"
"but, but we came togeth...." he didnt get a chance to finish as i was out the door running to the nearest bus-stop
Bastards, how dare they, I've been fuming ever since
overreaction? maybe but it just really made me mad
I guess i should call Mr.Hong and apologise, hes tried to call me 5-6 times but i just cant bare to speak to him
I'll have to at some point though, as I left my glasses in the sauna and contacts hurt my eyes
*sigh*
Simon
p.s Chuck and 'd'man, how have you been? i dont know if i can face the Suwon trip after all this.
After yesterdays class I agreed to go for lunch with my instructor Mr.Hong, it was a big deal for him as it was our first lunch date together so he decided we should go to a place in the country, about 15 minutes out of town.
On the way we passed the DongJuPock hot spring and Mr.Hong suggested we go in for a while and soak away the tensions of Fujitsu.
The lonely planet says "....there are many hotsprings throughout korea...nudity is optional."
Ive been considering visiting the hotspring for awhile, but that last sentence in the guide book has always held me back "...nudity is optional" I certainly didnt want to be nude with Mr.Hong and it was the last thing on my mind when we headed out countryside, so I told him that I felt a cold coming on and perhaps a hotspring wan't the best idea.
"Oh Siemon you be ok, drink 'dis" he said, handing me a disgusting deer antler (and god knows what else) energy tonic as we pulled into the driveway.
"Listen Mr.Hong I'm really hungry perhaps we should just..." I couldnt finish the sentence as Mr.Hong put his hand in front of my face laughed and said, " is ok, me pay, no dutcheepay, take ticket"
so now it was too late and I resigned myself to the visit, It couldn't be too bad right? nudity after all is only 'optional'
Now its not that I have a problem with nudity, or being nude, its just I have a unique body shape (in this country anyway) and a tendency to turn pink at a sudden change of temperature.
I dont have any problems downstairs, my winkle is no smaller than anyone elses but my ex-girlfriend once told me that it appears smaller than other peoples because of my thigh and buttock shape, and this is not a problem.
So we went inside and were given locker keys. Instantly my fear was recognised,
NO bathing suits!!!!!
I stood there for awhile feeling nauseous and I realised I was crying, goddamnit! not now!
Mr.Hong was undressed in a flash and I was surprised that although a bald man he was covered in the most impressive body hair, and like most Koreans, was hung like a horse
I got myself together and slowly undressed, Mr.Hong was keen to get into it so he said he would shower and meet me in the sauna.
Once I'd taken off my clothes I felt a little better about the experience, we're all men, and I was sure noone was going to stare at me for being a little different.
I grabbed a little 'teatowel' which didnt quite go full circle around me and walked to the main room, there were probably about 20 men in their, most of whom lloked like they were an army group, and when I walked in, silence fell over the room. i decided to make a beeline straight for the sauna which was in the back corner, but that became difficult as my glasses quickly fogged up in the humid environment.
Eventually I found my way, said hi to Mr.Hong, and took a seat back corner of the room.
After a minute or two Mr.Hong announced he was going to the toilet. Soon after he left the heat really started to get to me and i could feel myself 'pinking up', SOMEONE just HAD to say something, "excusee meee mool de ruel ga yo?"
although im still learning korean i knew what he was saying wasnt nice, and it was enough for me, I stood up threw my towel on the floor and said "Excusee meee you all think youre pretty cool dont you picking on somebody different!" with that I stormed out and made straight for the dressing room, i couldnt get changed fast enough. Mr.Hong was surprised to see me as he came from the toilets "Siemon, ok? why? sick?..." thats when I put MY hand in front of HIS face and said, "I didnt sign up for this mate! and i'm leaving!"
"but, but we came togeth...." he didnt get a chance to finish as i was out the door running to the nearest bus-stop
Bastards, how dare they, I've been fuming ever since
overreaction? maybe but it just really made me mad
I guess i should call Mr.Hong and apologise, hes tried to call me 5-6 times but i just cant bare to speak to him
I'll have to at some point though, as I left my glasses in the sauna and contacts hurt my eyes
*sigh*
Simon
p.s Chuck and 'd'man, how have you been? i dont know if i can face the Suwon trip after all this.
posted by Bar Bar Butt @ 7:56 PM
5 Comments:
At 9:02 PM,
Anonymous said…
Poor Dav... I mean Simon. How dare that bastard ask you if you wanted some "mool"? Although i could never interpret the language half as well as you, Im sure mool must be something both ignorant and insulting.
Furthermore... I dont think it is at all fair for those Korean men with their ridiculously large genitals to single you out for their own amusement.
I dont blame you for storming out. In fact, I can think of a better way to handle such a situation after being intentionally insulted like that.
Also, dont feel bad about crying. Every man cries at least once a day. Anyone who says he doesnt is a liar.
Be strong D... Simon. The world is a nasty place
-----Jack Spratt
At 11:00 PM,
Anonymous said…
Hi Simon...it's me again your loyal fan. I've decided to just keep calling you Simon and lose that old tag of dave, no in fact Simon GAE would be better becuase it's a morph of both your new anglo name and korean name...right! I can understand that because your last blog was turning you into a somewhat occultist identity, you are now operating as Simon GAE. Good on you for storming out of the men's sauna like that. It's despicable that grown men can treat other grown men in such a way. I too fully understood your brilliant romanization of that horrible man's poor use of his mother tongue. I would have flicked his tight little yellow buttocks with my hard wet towel if I had been there with you Simon GAE. I know what it's like inside those demonstrative places...but I don't recall having a problem getting my towel around my chalky waist. Anyway, enough for now, I can feel myself getting flustered. I do pray that you get your glasses back Simon GAE, and perhaps a written apology from Mr. Hong wouldn't go to far astray.
Your devout admirer
the loyal fan.
At 11:10 PM,
Anonymous said…
Hi Simon,
I totally understand you running off like that, and don't feel bad. Mr. Hong should have never put in that situation. And don't worry, what those Korean guys said wasn't that bad, anyway.
If you think you need some alone time, and you can't make it to the round-up, I totally understand. We were really looking forward to seeing you, though. But if you do miss the round up, you will also miss meeting Adam who found out about it somehow. Ugh Ugh
Cheers Mate
Chuck
At 12:17 AM,
Anonymous said…
Jack, Chuck and Loyal, thanks so much for the kind words, they are really appreciated.
Chuck I CANNOT believe Adam found out, are we gonna have to put up with THAT behaviour all night?
I might make the trip, see how I surface in the morning, I have cake with M later and what seems to be the start of a cold, but I guess it is d'mans birthday so i'll try and drag myself up there.
Did you get him anything?
If not then DON'T (close your eyes Dman) get him a mousepad o.k, sorry I should have told you earlier....*hugs*
At 5:50 AM,
Anonymous said…
Hey Dude
sounds like a hard time
you should open up to Mr.Hong and tell him how uncomfortable the experience made you feel
If he's a real man he'll understand
take care
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