Three things that made me wanna barf today

1) The presumption by one of my co-workers that I didn't want to join her for lunch.
2) Stalone--have you seen that guy?
3) a wet fart I had at 10 this morning--it's 12 and I still haven't changed my shorts.
4) the fact that my scrotum is tight sometimes, and loose other times.
5) no one scratches their balls. they say they scratch, but they dont